denied love

[ischo]

i just had to realize again that there's nothing worse than denied love. shit, life's a bitch..... and then you die, right?
ahh, i'm such a whuzzy

but it really hurts

ouch

[pille'ocheoni]

sucky......................i have picked up a bad habit of being too distant, and un-attachable.......so that i could not get hurt, but hey everybody does their own thing. hope things get better.cheers

[piscaries]

(imho) it's better to have never lost at all than to have gotten it and lose it later...

keep your head in the gear and keep pumpin out those sweet tracks of yours.

[invisibleplanet]

yeah - spill ur soul into ur creations...and turn to ur 'other' muse
maybe u make even better trax when ur feeling like this...

[grobelaar]

Unrequited love can be a splendid thing... can also be tragic too...

I usually find a good ole wallow for a bit helps - its not gonna go away so you might as well enjoy it while its about - and yeah you may find energy to creative stuff, even if its destructively creative...

A good ole crying sesh helps (but don't say I said so) *coughs in a gruff, manly manner*

[pille'ocheoni]

yeah listen to these guys..............emotions and past hurt experences can build up and dominate in later instances. me for example..........so cam said it best, its better to have loved, cause when its all done. atleast you had that.

[ischo]

cheers all,
i really needed to get this off my back, sort of speak to focus.
i fink i'm gonna hide behind me laptop for a while and donate
some emotional tunes to my outer world.

thx..... and at least i have loved, right?

[piscaries]

true. and you will again. it will find you again.

[MUX]

heartbreak only makes you stronger
im like ROCK HARD by now

[namshub]

try killin sum kittens maybe??

[piscaries]

leave the kitties out of this...

[invisibleplanet]

well, i guess that love can be denied in any 'relationship'.
so many people give love with conditions attached
and these conditions are the root cause of the denial of love.

[MUX]

well... arent rules there to be broken?

[invisibleplanet]

when love is denied, because a relationship rule has been broken, both parties are losers in what was a synergistic relationship.
there can be no 'winners' when love is given with conditions attached.

do u find that it is when conditions are placed on love that a break down in relationship occurs, or am i way off the mark here??
(to anyone)

[enigmatic]

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger

You'll get over it

Even maybe at some later stage you'll look back on events and laugh ;-)

[invisibleplanet]

Originally posted by MUX
well... arent rules there to be broken?

rules are there to be made, too!

so if some dumb 'rule' or principal is causing unhappiness, i head-strongly feel that the rule needs to be examined, or replaced by a better, more fitting rule - but i guess u need someone flexible to play THAT game with.

i know from experience, that sometimes the relationship is sacrificed, instead of the restrictive rule. :!

and then again, some principals/ethics cannot be changed....

anyone read reich's treatise on human relating?

[tsr_tomas]

i´m super bitter, i can´t enjoy love at this moment... but i guess i´ll find someone or something one day. hahhahaa

[invisibleplanet]

i guess so ... it's probably unavoidable...


b4 i go 2 sleep, i want to make clear that by my lil rant in the last two posts, i don't mean to imply that the end of a relationship is unavoidable! sometimes they end, and we have no control over that, sometimes we are the person causing the end, and because, (of course), it takes two people to make the relationship. when the other person, for their own reasons, desires and end to it, we have no choice, but to mourn it's loss, and move on.

[pille'ocheoni]

yeah i have a hope the right person will come..........i just hope i have the opportunity to have children. *sniffle

[7875]

the trick is to not get your ego all wrapped up in this fanatizied imagination of "im swept away by love!!" existing in this life with an awareness of how mad this world really is is heartbreaking enough for me. then throw in some emotional longing and the idea that "hey, maybe this person can save me from feeling alone" and you've got a recipe for having the chair kicked out from under you and falling straight on your ass.
the only way that really keeps you from caring about all that shit is just to adopt a big drug habit. of course, that can kill you, so really, that's not a good idea.
love is an idea
understanding, now there's something to long for

[7875]

oh and ip, don't you think that all relationships are doomed to end at some point?

[invisibleplanet]

Originally posted by 7875
the trick is to not get your ego all wrapped up in this fanatizied imagination of "im swept away by love!!" existing in this life with an awareness of how mad this world really is is heartbreaking enough for me. then throw in some emotional longing and the idea that "hey, maybe this person can save me from feeling alone" and you've got a recipe for having the chair kicked out from under you and falling straight on your ass.

the 'im swept away by love' romantic rose coloured spex phenomena has a name now.. 'limerence' (http://www.isi.edu/~brian/elbows/limerence.html)
Limerence is Romantic love marked by preoccupation, and often, obsession, with the loved one.

[abi]

I don't think you can love and expect to be loved back. You just risk it, feeling is what being alive is all about. You love and accept the consequenses.

[invisibleplanet]

true words...courage,mon coeur!

a poem of denied love, and how much it fucking hurts...by e e cummings

it may not always be so; and i say
that if your lips, which i have loved should touch
another's, and your dear strong fingers clutch
his heart, as mine in time not far away;
if on another's face your sweet hair lay
in such silence as i know, or such
great writhing words as, uttering overmuch,
stand helplessly before the spirit at bay;
if this should be, i say if this should be-
you of my heart, send me a little word;
that i may go unto him and take his hands,
saying, Accept all happiness from me.
then shall i turn my face, and hear one bird
sing terribly afar in the lost lands.

[wheezer]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2916669204&category=1467

[aleks]

MUHAHAHAHA...what were you looking for wheezer?

[ischo]

good one wheezer.....
i fink i'll give it a go ;)

and a nice poem IP

[invisibleplanet]

http://www.wam.umd.edu/~rui/Women.asf

[pille'ocheoni]

funny as shit lol

[wheezer]

@aleks
mailorder bride lol

@topic
wo die liebe hinfällt, bleibt sie liegen, auch wenns ein haufen mist ist.

[namshub]

hahahahahahaha . brilliant.

[invisibleplanet]

Originally posted by 7875
oh and ip, don't you think that all relationships are doomed to end at some point?

yes i do think so...
death or divorce or deceit are maybe the three most common ways that relationships end.

glad u liked the cartoon (http://www.wam.umd.edu/~rui/Women.asf), namshub - it's quite cynical, really!

i must admit to being baffled how some people's relationships even managed to get off the ground!

[zongkong]

hell, I'm having trouble seeing how people can have relationships; it just takes a lot of time really.......
and before tomas' says it, yes I know, who am I to speak since I could be heading into one right now......... aah fuck it :D

[bitch one]

love is gay

[zongkong]

hear hear

[invisibleplanet]

Originally posted by bitch one
love is gay

the greeks had LOADS of words for different kinds of love.
perhaps eros and agape are the two most well known.
so i wondered to myself which kind of love are u talkin about?

best-freinds love?
erotic love?
unselfish love?
possessive love?
romantic love?
game-playing love?
pragmatic love?

[4md]

Love is too difficult for me ...

[CHIP TRONIC]

or you finally get ......maniac depressive
like me LOOOL
the only line is the borderline

[Weishaupt]

Originally posted by 4md
Love is too difficult for me ...

maybe u r to difficult for the love????
*g

[pille'ocheoni]

good one

[4md]

maybe u r to difficult for the love
perhaps u're right ... don't know .... that's something I'm anable to manage ...

[CHIP TRONIC]

man, i am sure if i hadn´t made certain experiences.....
i would listen to trance music ....hahahaha no not really

but i guess the more experienced you are the less it hurts....

well not really. hmmm.
even if you think that a person is your one and only love ___OPEN YOUR EYES! there are so many cool people outside!
this was the main lesson i´ve learned during the past years.

If you take things to badly you can´t enjoy life properly.

A good drinks or more .-)
good music good people

and life is cool

[4md]

Yeah the sun is shining & the sKy is Blue !

[grobelaar]

Originally posted by invisibleplanet


the greeks had LOADS of words for different kinds of love.
perhaps eros and agape are the two most well known.
so i wondered to myself which kind of love are u talkin about?

best-freinds love?
erotic love?
unselfish love?
possessive love?
romantic love?
game-playing love?
pragmatic love?

That's a great idea - sometimes English can be too ambiguous. I'll have best-friends, erotic and game-playing - well I am a game designer - I might actually be good at that one :-)

[Marolo]

Originally posted by invisibleplanet


best-freinds love?
erotic love?
unselfish love?
possessive love?
romantic love?
game-playing love?
pragmatic love?

What love?

[7875]

a mate of mine (damn, been on here too much) was telling me the other day about this new girl that he is madly in love with (after only 3 weeks mind you) and how gorgeous she is and how he's never felt this way before, on and on.
being that i am alone and don't suspect this happy ending for myself, i had the overwhelming feeling to empty the entire contents of my stomach into a trash can.
what's wrong with me?

[wheezer]

you've gotten cynical? wake up and inhale the flowers, it's spring =)

[invisibleplanet]

7875
be glad for your friend...after 3 wks he is giddy on kisses and the newness of discovering all about her and him together..

[invisibleplanet]

she being Brand

-new;and you
know consequently a
little stiff i was
careful of her and (having

thoroughly oiled the universal
joint tested my gas felt of
her radiator made sure her springs were O.

K.went right to it flooded-the-carburetor cranked her
up,slipped the
clutch (and then somehow got into reverse she
kicked what
the hell) next
minute i was back in neutral tried and

again slo-wly;bare,ly nudg. ing (my

lev-er Right-

oh and her gears being in
A 1 shape passed
from low through
second-in-to-high like
greasedlightning) just as we turned the corner of Divinity

avenue i touched the accelerator and give

her the juice,good

(it

was the first ride and believe i we was
happy to see how nice she acted right up to

the last minute coming back down by the Public
Gardens i slammed on

the
internalexpanding
&
externalcontracting
brakes Bothatonce and

brought allofher tremB

-ling
to a:dead.

stand-
;Still)


by e e cummings.

[ischo]

..... i've kinda got my head up again.... the result can be listened to in my ftp ....

[grobelaar]

Originally posted by invisibleplanet
she being Brand

-new;and you
know consequently a
little stiff i was
careful of her and (having

thoroughly oiled the universal
joint tested my gas felt of
her radiator made sure her springs were O.

K.went right to it flooded-the-carburetor cranked her
up,slipped the
clutch (and then somehow got into reverse she
kicked what
the hell) next
minute i was back in neutral tried and

again slo-wly;bare,ly nudg. ing (my

lev-er Right-

oh and her gears being in
A 1 shape passed
from low through
second-in-to-high like
greasedlightning) just as we turned the corner of Divinity

avenue i touched the accelerator and give

her the juice,good

(it

was the first ride and believe i we was
happy to see how nice she acted right up to

the last minute coming back down by the Public
Gardens i slammed on

the
internalexpanding
&
externalcontracting
brakes Bothatonce and

brought allofher tremB

-ling
to a:dead.

stand-
;Still)


by e e cummings.

He should have got an automatic :-)

[bitch one]

what is love?

baby don't hurt me.

don't hurt me

no no.
--------

i'm as serious as cancer

when i tell you

that rhythm is a dancer

[7875]

giddy on kisses?
more like thrilled to be humping a hot chicky.

[dirtyho]

I think I'm in love at the moment it's a nice feeling - enjoy it if you can. People make love too absolute. I can't get my head around this "one true love" thing, there are lots of people out there who you could be compatible with. Don't worry about maybe not having found the "one true love" for you, this imaginary perfect mate will spoil things between you and a real person of flesh and blood who can be hurt - that perfect mate can never be hurt - they are a figment of your imagination. You're with the person you've met through a mixture or circumstance, timing, personality, social group etc. Concentrate on the here and now, even if all relationships are doomed to end if you do this at least you'll be doing you're best for the person you're with and will probably keep a friend afterwards.

[Daddys Girl]

At the risk of sounding like a cynic, I don't actually believe in finding "the one" - how can it really be plausable that there is really only "one" person in the world that is destined for you?

I thought I was in love once - nothing ever came of it, other than me becoming dillusional (in really believing that we were going to get together), totally over-hyping every single interaction in my mind, and cursing at them in my brain when they did something that ruined the perfect picture of 'love'....

My best friend is pretty "in-love" at the moment - and I am happy for her (see, I'm not that mean...)

Unfortunately, all of my friends are doing that annoying thing:
"You'll find somebody, trust me - you won't be alone for long"...
Urgh.

I'm sure that love (1 on 1) is great, but all the other types of 'love' pretty well rock too...

D_G ;o)

[Hiro]

I think love is a series-

Keeps me hopeful at least... and eager to learn from each experience... Regardless of the state it leaves me in, sometimes...

[bitch one]

Originally posted by Daddys Girl
At the risk of sounding like a cynic, I don't actually believe in finding "the one" - how can it really be plausable that there is really only "one" person in the world that is destined for you?

D_G ;o)

if you live on an island with one other person and no contact with the outside world, it's pretty easy to find 'the one'.

by this i mean - finding 'the one' is perhaps more to do with circumstances than anything else. pretty unromantic eh?

[Daddys Girl]

Originally posted by bitch one


if you live on an island with one other person and no contact with the outside world, it's pretty easy to find 'the one'.

by this i mean - finding 'the one' is perhaps more to do with circumstances than anything else. pretty unromantic eh?


@ Bitch One:

"Circumstances" - I guess I see what you're driving at with that one...

If it is based on that pretty un-romantic theory, is that like saying that people tend to "settle" for what they hope to be 'the one' within their accessable circles?


D_G ;o)

[invisibleplanet]

Originally posted by dirtyho
I think I'm in love at the moment it's a nice feeling - enjoy it if you can. People make love too absolute. I can't get my head around this "one true love" thing, there are lots of people out there who you could be compatible with. Don't worry about maybe not having found the "one true love" for you, this imaginary perfect mate will spoil things between you and a real person of flesh and blood who can be hurt - that perfect mate can never be hurt - they are a figment of your imagination. You're with the person you've met through a mixture or circumstance, timing, personality, social group etc. Concentrate on the here and now, even if all relationships are doomed to end if you do this at least you'll be doing you're best for the person you're with and will probably keep a friend afterwards.

:)
i like what you said, dirtyho

[Hiro]

^^ I agree... beautiful and realistic words...

Beautiful moments are magic... and many- Just have to notice them- and enjoy them while they are near.