no-future story: ice-maschines and tree-counters

[Weishaupt]

once upon a time matt wake up in his bed. He went to the window and saw hes little dog fighting with the postman. the postman put a little paper out of his back and said to the dog:.......................... .............................. ..







please continue the story

[aleks]

don´t ry to bite me you fool or......

[Basic]

...I'll have to give you the Michael Jackson treatment, which is....

[invisibleplanet]

going to involve u, a sharp knife, and an aesthetically challenged plastic surgeon...






(hi Basic - it's me - unsicht)

[Basic]

.....a monkey, a veil, a high balcony not forgetting a....








(hello, I know *in my library whispering voice* ):)

[invisibleplanet]

...flash of photographers to record the event for posterity. Shocked to hear such violent threats from the Postman, Matt, opened the window and.......












*i think the correct collective name for a more than one photographer is a 'flash'* ;)

[Weishaupt]

saw some ice-machines, who play a part of shakespears hamlet.
To be or not to be.........that is the.................

[MUX]

http://www.liferesearchuniversal.com/question.jpeg

[Weishaupt]

......and matt found god.

he say....

[Sheridan]

where have you been all my life? I thought I had lost you back at the fork in the road. and in a soft voice god responded....

[thetonewrecker]

do you have any toilet paper? I ran out over here.

[MUX]

and while ur searching for that loo roll..
have u got an extra copy of kat moda ep?

[pille'ocheoni]

never i would never buy that shite!only if it had a complimentary box of depends extra strength.now how would you react to a tree falling through your garage on thursday?

[aleks]

ohhhhh, that´s wonderful. i love britney spears she is so...

[Sheridan]

rested when autotune does ALL the work.
so she calls shakira to go...

[piscaries]

...visit their songwriters because lord knows their careers would be over if they actually wrote a song of their own. but on the way to the studio they ran into...

[pille'ocheoni]

....problems with the 8-track..........damn this piece of shit and then they ran into problems with the drivers for the....

[Weishaupt]

hairmaschine.........
the mashine says:
Hi,my name is andy, im your pesonal.........

[jukka]

...personal slave and i wanna...i wanna........i wanna hurt you motherfucker !!!so you better get ya ass........

[Weishaupt]

to the dentist, he will put a..............

[piscaries]

....tube in your mouth, or maybe even a...

[invisibleplanet]

..a micro-transmitter into your tooth, and then the voices in your head will....

[jukka]

..will give you the instructions to........

[Weishaupt]

say:

youre a chesscomputer.................

the dentist play with a nummber of a pizza service.
he ring and a voice say:

[jukka]

...good evening my name is art lukm and i am a good man.....

[Ruben A]

hell no I am - I just wanna have a closer look on Dave Clarke´s baaaaaallllllsss bacause...

[Weishaupt]

it smells so...puhhh man..............
what for a after shave you use?????

[jukka]

nivea mild.....becouse i am so sensitive and i don't want to....

[thetonewrecker]

cry like president Bush

[Weishaupt]

the dentist eat his right leg and give matt the bill............
"what??"crys matt..........
so much..............
he throw.........

[jukka]

and my mother forbid me to take/use any alcohol

[thetonewrecker]

the dentist through the window and he falls for 3 floors but doesn't hit the ground because..

[invisibleplanet]

suddenly gravity reversed, and he fell upwards.

"i'm confused", said the one-legged dentist, as his life-blood pumped out of the gnawed leg-stump at 130 bpm.....

[wheezer]

squared. The dentist stared at his tattered rags and asked himself: "What am I doing here? What ...

[Weishaupt]

he got a call from his timedealer.............
"stop the time,stop the time"...
and suddenly, the scene freeze and anybody starts a motor.........

wich direction please??

[aleks]

the way to the bar is right there, so you gotta go left...

[thetonewrecker]

three ninjas ran in a single file line

[7875]

all looking for something to chop, but there wasn't anything. just a tub of cottage cheese and a box of crackers. being that killing people is very tiring, one ninja decided to have some of the cottage cheese and crackers. first bite, good, second bite, sorta warm. by the third bite the ninja began to feel the room start to seperate. confused he....

[Sheridan]

rang the god the other day, but he could not pick up the phone...:!
why is that to remember when your mind is not your own..
so they ran to the gas station and fell upon....

[wheezer]

a very large shoebox that could hold about 20 (ninjas), lined with French bouillon cubes, colored a rather garish neon pink. The ninja high on cottage cheese jumped into the box and...

[Weishaupt]

scream:
"Who of you fucking guys have my hairstylist send to blue gas station by cash on delivery??"
Music in the background. Abba is playing "Dancin Queen" and on the street you hear a man cry:

Hey, where my feets???

Suddenly Tobias Schmidt jump around the corner with hes new record:...............

[wheezer]

Bootyjuice 2: Bootyjuice goes to Africa EP on Juicemaster Jams, release number 14. It's a introspective dealie about dogs and their diseases. The ninja was even more baked by now and...

[Sheridan]

and just then one of the ninjas took off his mask and it was jeff mills!!
with HIS new record in hand and a revamped philosophy of how techno music is the sound track to space travel. and how what we believe to be reality is not so! it is meerly a conglomeration of tiny random thought patterns that combine themselves to create our true conscious.

after he could take no more, toby jumped up and...

[Weishaupt]

to the next level.
He got three freelives and he jump over the yellow river and meet niel landstrum. Niel was pist. he lost his money bag and he......

[pille'ocheoni]

... reached his hands into the air and screamed ........

[Weishaupt]

Jesus he knows me....and he knows im right.
After this words neil found his money bag on the street.
In the background some tv´s rapping a old women for fun and......

[pille'ocheoni]

tin covered house's become vortex's and splatter violet colored rain drops everywhere.when this rain falls it makes the most beautiful sounds that almost sounds like a child playing with.....

[Weishaupt]

plastic frogs who eating thé skin of a silver rocket.
Cristian Vogel saw this scene and he thought by himself:

This man is not your ordenary................

[pille'ocheoni]

hotdog festival...what the hell is going on.where are the hotdogs?well what that over there?! is that a .....

[Weishaupt]

example for a dog-eat and-spy-out game or the last page of the bock from last nite????

Cristian was confused. A little tree called Dave comes over the street.
Dave is 3 years old and it was his first time in the tree school.

He gaves Cristian an ice..........

[pille'ocheoni]

covered......deep fried mars bar.....with coconuts on it and says how's that production coming alomg?well says the little boy "its going fine but i have a problem with the particle accelerator for my modular ractionary fluinizationaryistsical......

[Weishaupt]

submarine.
"Ohh" said Dave.
"I have the some poblem with my girlfriend anita
Everytime she has hunger for teleporting webtumbstones"

Jamie comes by the way with his new......

[pille'ocheoni]

12.8 f-550 diesel powerstroke rear wheel drive .......

[emef]

...shopping trolley. its the only way to get round these damned busy hypermarkets now its so close to christmas.
it was only when he was getting off his trolley that he turned with horror to see...

[wheezer]

the Chief Rocker Busy B himself, forming a "B" with dollar bills on a bed in a cheap motel, two girls and a sprayer looking on. "I have X-ray vision!", he thought and...

[Weishaupt]

see the true around himself.
All my thouhgst are wrong.
This is the life.
all this people are wrong. all this wrong this are wrong.
What is true?
My love is true. my freinds are true.
Fuck techno. Fuck for the people.
i can understand jamie with his new car.
youre right!
Waht shouldt i do. i love this music. i love this movement.
I ask myself, what shouldt i do???????
I follow the white rabbit........................ ..........

[Sheridan]

to the slaughterhouse where...

[invisibleplanet]

where the stench of stale death grips my nostrils and forces an olefactory shut-down. a ghostly herd of broken-legged sheep bleat pitifully from an empty pen.
jamie picks up the pen and begins to write..

[wheezer]

100 bottles of beer on the wall, 100 bottles of beer,
if one of those bottles should happen to fall,
99 bottles of beer on the wall...

[invisibleplanet]

99 bottles of beer,
if one of those bottles should happen to fall,
98 bottles of beer on the wall..."

the white rabbit beckons from behind a plastic door..

[Weishaupt]

and sing:

"98 bottles of beer on the wall"
hihei hihei hooooo
...............cos it is hurt.

anyway this white rabbit will grow up to an dj.
what should he do???

[wheezer]

hop a short, distinct path westward, stopping only for laughing gas & noodle soup. for its ultimate goal in life is to...

[aleks]

is to get a brazilian wax ...

[invisibleplanet]

..everday for his facial-hair, giving him the perfect goatie beard. After all the brazillian waxing his girlfriend had endured, he thought this facial wax a most noble ultimate goal :) His only concern was, after he had attained this goal, what then could his next goal be? Or did 'ultimate' mean the last goal he would ever achieve? He became morbid pondering death for a while, and then decided to...

[pille'ocheoni]

....go visit the all mighty wise gypsy of holbolkin,kansas.she was a stout little woman with bright purple hair and she knew many things in the way of death,desire,and waxing too.for she had won the state championships for the most facial hair on a woman, 20 years in a row.the only thing she wanted in return for this gift of knowledge was......

[invisibleplanet]

a fritillary and a french kiss upon her wrinkled lips...

[7875]

and a hot tufo and hummus sandwich. Life hadn't been too kind to her. She had been born without enamel on her teeth and most of them had been rotting her whole life. She ate anything she could drink, mostly grass juice and malt liquor. In her house she sat...

[invisibleplanet]

..day in, day out, whilst a steady stream of indecisive people called upon her, in some vain hope that she might have the answer. She didn't have the heart to tell them that she thought she was a fake, they wanted so very much to hear words of wisdom that they would believe anything she told them. She thought that because they believed what she told them, they more or less brought about the consequences they so desired by their own efforts, and that she was merely the catalyst to them realising that they had the answer locked inside them. On the particular day that Jamie had called, she had arisen early in the morning, to the sound of the old tattered cockeral she kept to service her hens. Drawing water from the butt standing outside her door, she felt her first real premonition that her life was about to change. A sense of urgency made her complete her chores before the sun rose over the old-hay loft. She was sitting on her veranda, rocking and singing quietly to herself, when Jamie strode into her yard. Her ancient bones cracked audibly as she rose slowly from her chair to greet him, and a thunderous fart released itself from her fermenting-grass ridden bowels.
"Hello there sonny" she croaked.
Jamie stepped up onto the first step of the veranda and said, ".....

[pille'ocheoni]

momma!..............oh how i missed your bouquet!.....it had been years apon years since the boy once named frudrika came home.for he was born here many moons ago and left as a young boy to the far of country unknown to anyone.as they layed upside down in the hay barn he asked his momma the question that has been haunting his brain for years.momma did i ever........